The lonleyness

Since the 5th of May I have been alone. Well, can you say alone and really mean it? no, I have been without the one person who has given my life spice over the last 3 years. The man who I count as my greatest love, my best friend and the only one who really ever managed to figure me out. Sometimes I think no one knows me really, but then he surprises me, and I love him for it. Well, right now, HE isn't here. It's a sad time. But there is joy to be found.

Letters

Letters are lovers food. At some point in a relationship I recommend everyone separate and confine themselves to the odd phone call and letters. Getting to know someone, the way they write in letters, the carefully-thought-out ideas and sentiments of love that really touch the sad and lonely heart; they really do make the love deeper. The love I have for my husband is deeper now than ever, and it comes with an understanding of his feelings that - being a talker - I don't often here.

Thinking about what to say next.

When reading a letter you can't spend the time thinking about what to say next. You cherish, relish, and fully accept every word written on the page. It is there to be read and reread to fully take in every thought and feeling thorough the page. It gives me more insight into his feelings and hopes and the time to fully think about his point of view. I know I have a problem with listening, and this has been a great opportunity to really listen to my husband.

BUT

I would still rather be with him than without him... and even though I love the letters I love the arms more.

*HUG*